EnCoffin Me Chapter 32
Translated by Q the Panda (ko-fi)
Chapter 32
The manticore was easy to deal with. Alexio stroked the wolf cub, getting a small clump of shed fur. He casually rolled the fur into a ball and tossed it out. The moment it landed, it turned into a swift bat. With that, the manticore would surely…
“Awooo!”
But instead of pouncing after the bat, the manticore turned and bolted as if it had seen not a bat, but a psychological shadow. It reminded it of the person who had snatched the button. With a quick sniff, it caught the scent of that terrifying person lingering on the vampire.
So it tucked its tail between its legs and fled without looking back, chased by the bat.
Alexio: “……”
Something felt a little off, but at least it got the job done.
What troubled Alexio more was the night birds. Back in his time, night birds had been extremely common, but mostly as something served at the dinner table. As a prince, he certainly would naturally not stoop to raising such creatures. He didn't even know what night birds normally ate, let alone how to make one that was on a hunger strike eat again. He…
Alexio's mind suddenly went blank when he saw what was perched on the shelf…
A black ball?
Did people in this era have a special fondness for round things? Round manticore, round wolf cub… even the sleek, long-winged, agile night birds had been raised into a ball. How was anyone supposed to eat it… no, wait, this one was a protected species. He couldn’t eat it or he'd end up behind bars!
The black balls of fluff perched peacefully on their perches, their feathers fluffy and glossy from daily meticulous care. Every now and then, they would tilt their necks and let out a soft chirp. Nearby, their caretaker promptly took out a wooden backscratcher and gently scratched a night bird's neck. It narrowed its eyes in enjoyment, then let out another chirp. This time, it was asking for fruit. But after a few pecks, it lost interest, turning its head away with a dismissive flick.
Alexio: So fat… no, so lazy!
The night bird, resting with its eyes closed, sensed a gaze and shifted a few centimeters uneasily on the perch. Another piece of fruit was brought to its beak. It stopped thinking too much, pecked at it a few times, then once again turned its head away in disdain. But unlike before, this time the fruit wasn't taken back. It remained firmly held in front of it.
The night bird glared at the caretaker for not taking the hint, only to meet the cold, expressionless face of the vampire.
Alexio held a toothpick with a piece of fruit on it. He showed no intention of giving up just because the bird wasn't eating. Instead, he kept a wooden face and stubbornly held the fruit out again.
Alexio: Eat.
The night bird's feathers puffed up one by one. Before the caretaker could step in to smooth things over, it quickly lowered its head and gobbled up the fruit. Then it looked up at Alexio with a flattering gaze. Alexio remained expressionless, offering no praise for its cooperation. He simply speared another piece of fruit.
“Eat.” Alexio didn't know what else to say, so he went with the simplest command. He looked around. All the black puffballs on the shelf had instantly puffed up like sea urchins, lowering their heads to look for something to eat. Two of them even fought over a piece of fruit, tumbling off the shelf. Before the caretaker could pick them up, they quietly climbed back up on their own and resumed pretending to eat with great enthusiasm.
After the fruits came the main course. Alexio glanced at the lunch box filled with a colorful mix of meat and vegetables. These night birds were probably eating better than most humans. He couldn't understand why they'd gone on a hunger strike. As he pondered this, the steady sounds of eating suddenly turned into the clatter of a beak hitting an empty box. Alexio looked up. The bird he had fed had already finished everything and was now pecking furiously at the empty container.
That hungry, and it still went on a hunger strike?
Night bird: …Do you think I dare stop?!
Alexio couldn't help but reach out. He couldn't even hold the night bird with one hand. It was too round. He had to partially wrap his arm around it to test its plumpness. Cool, smooth, and delicate to the touch, night bird feathers had been highly sought after even ten thousand years ago. And the meat… Wait, why was he thinking illegal things again?!
The night bird being inspected was nearly scared to tears.
The caretaker stared, dumbfounded, at the night birds who were now desperately eating. The moment the vampire showed up, they all started behaving. It was unbelievable! He thanked Alexio repeatedly, but Alexio felt he hadn't done anything at all. He simply gave a small shake of his head and, as if it were an afterthought, picked up the wolf cub who was trying to eat fruits off the floor.
Today's exercise was definitely sufficient.
It was time to clock out. ORZ
Lucius had also finished his day's work. The Institute of Ancient History had made special arrangements for both him and Alexio by allocating office space within the conservation center. He'd had a very pleasant conversation with a few editors, and the work had gone smoothly. In a few more months, the revised historical records would finally be ready for release.
In any case, this job was far less stressful than working at the Holy Temple.
Lucius sat in the center's car, waiting to head home with Alexio. Then he saw a thoroughly worn-out vampire drag himself onboard, slump into his seat, blankly stare into space, and finally sag lifelessly against the backrest.
Alexio sat in the front seat. Lucius sat in the back, his carefully chosen spot. Without a word, Lucius pulled out his notebook, ready to take notes.
“What's wrong? Work not going well?”
“…I'm really struggling.”
“But I heard you've been doing a great job.”
Alexio slowly turned his head to look at him. Lucius calmly hid the notebook to the side. Alexio then slowly turned his head back, and Lucius placed the notebook back on his lap.
“I think I'm developing a fear of work…” Alexio said gloomily. “You know what I mean? First it's boomerangs, then hunger strikes. It's not physically tiring, but it's mentally exhausting… Not just exhausting, it's draining…”
Lucius paused mid-note. For the first time in his life, he couldn't make sense of what Alexio was saying. Frowning in confusion, he pulled up chat logs from various sources on his lightbrain. Every message said the same thing: Alexio was doing great and had solved a lot of problems at the center.
Lucius: No choice. I will investigate all night!
The next morning, Lucius, sporting dark circles after a sleepless night, opened the breakfast delivered from the center. Once things at work settled down, they could stop these deliveries. He'd just buy ingredients and cook at home. After unboxing the meal, he waited a while before finally seeing the vampire slowly trudge downstairs. Alexio sat at the table, gripping his fork like a man wronged by fate.
Lucius: Keep investigating through the night!
On the third day, the food delivery arrived long before Alexio came downstairs. He didn't rush to eat. Instead, he flopped face down on the sofa, his voice muffled and low.
“I'll be fine soon… just… need to lie down a bit first…”
Lucius: Keep investigating!
On the fourth day, Lucius knocked on the door. Alexio slowly opened it, ate breakfast listlessly, then went to the conservation center just as listlessly.
Lucius: Con—tin—ue—
On the fifth day, Alexio didn't get up.
Lucius put down the food and knocked again. He had to get to the bottom of this today. He was practically burning the candle at both ends himself!
“Alexi, time to get to work.”
“Aaaaaah, are you a demon?!” Something hit the door with a thud. The vampire groaned under the covers. “If you don't mention work, we can still live together! Say one more word and I'll pull up the carrots in the flowerbed!”
“……”
They were having a perfectly normal conversation, so why mistreat the carrots?!
“Let's talk this through,” Lucius said gently. “No need to take it out on the carrots.”
“……”
This time it seemed to be a pillow, thrown straight at the door, a clear sign of the vampire's anger.
The saint paused at the door for a moment, then sent a message to the conservation center informing them of Alexio's leave. His mental state really wasn't fit for work. After that, he knocked again.
“May I come in?”
Lucius pushed the door open.
The vampire's room was draped in heavy dark curtains that blocked out all sunlight. A camera lay discarded behind the door. Pieces of a model kit were scattered on the floor, seemingly abandoned midway. On the round table, alongside the incomplete model, sat a row of small flower pots. Lucius leaned closer and recognized the fragile jade-green seedlings—
All of them were his tomato plants.
He knew it! With such excellent crop varieties ten thousand years later and his flowerbed's ideal temperature and humidity, how could they not sprout? It turned out Alexio had stolen them all into his room to be used as potted plants!
Lucius slowly lifted his head, meeting Alexio's gaze peeking out from under the covers. Startled, Alexio quickly tightened the blanket, wrapping himself up like a silkworm cocoon once again.
“…Explain yourself.” Lucius held up the stolen goods and approached the vampire's bed. The lump under the blanket squirmed, then stubbornly resisted, making Lucius laugh in frustration.
“No explanation? Then go to work.” He grabbed a corner of the blanket, but the vampire inside struggled fiercely.
“You demon! It's just a few tomato plants!”
“Can you swear you never eyed my carrots? Come out! Time to work!”
“I won't! Demon! Ahhh, let go!”
“If you don't work, I can't work either! Get up!”
Alexio clung too tightly to the blanket to be pulled free, so Lucius had no choice but to drag both the blanket and the vampire off the bed. It dawned on him that Alexio hadn't chosen to sleep in a coffin, but instead had made himself a soft bed, a very un-vampire thing to do. He made a mental note.
Wrapped in the blanket, Alexio was dragged across the floor, out the door, and down the stairs. When his head bumped a few times on the steps, he strangely felt a faint sense of relief.
See, this was the kind of normal life a creature of darkness should have. The overindulgence and careful coddling at the conservation center had produced creatures who were either foolish or silly. Although he was grateful for their aid after awakening from his ten-thousand-year-long slumber, he couldn't deny the discomfort of being surrounded by such fragility.
He wanted to change some of these dark creatures, so they could live independently and thrive just like any other race.
“But it's very hard,” Alexio said, lying back on the floor.
Lucius stopped dragging the blanket and the vampire wrapped inside it. He looked down at Alexio lying on his back. In those red eyes was an unyielding pride and fearlessness, a light that had not dimmed despite being spoiled by everyone in this era for so long. Whether in memory or in the present, he never disliked that light, because a vampire with such a gaze was his true rival, the ultimate goal he had pursued through years of training and effort.
In other words, he held deep respect for this Alexio.
“I thought there was nothing you couldn't do.” He stepped back, took out some red tea he had bought when moving in, along with a large box of milk, and asked, “Want some milk tea?”
“…Yes.”
Alexio's spirits lifted a little. He shifted from the floor to the sofa, wrapped in the blanket, tilting his head to watch the saint prepare the tea. The air filled with the scent of tea and milk, easing the slight gloom left by the past few days.
There wasn't a bad mood that couldn't be fixed with a cup of milk tea, and if there was, make it two!
The saint finished brewing the tea and poured it into a short, chubby, carrot-shaped cup. Alexio had no idea when that cup had been bought. He reached out for the tea but grabbed nothing. Lucius moved the cup from left to right, then right to left, and before Alexio could get annoyed, finally placed it firmly in his hand, saying clearly, “If you drink this milk tea, then stop tormenting my carrots.”
“……”
Fine.
The saint didn't sit down but leaned against the sofa, sipping the sweet milk tea.
“No matter how difficult, it can be solved.” He glanced sideways and could see the top of the vampire's head. “Since you gave me some candy before, I happen to have an idea to share.”
“What?!”
Lucius pulled up a page on his lightbrain and handed it to Alexio. Alexio held his milk tea in one hand and took the terminal with the other. On it was a black emblem—
An eye at the center, wings of a bat spread wide on both sides. The entire design exuded the sinister elegance unique to creatures of darkness.
The saint's voice came softly through the scent of the tea.
“In the world ten thousand years later, there's not only the conservation center but also an organization of the dark creatures themselves, called—”
“The Association of Dark Creatures.”