Real Missy Relies on Food to Counterattack Chapter 67
Translated by Serena Love
Unedited
Chapter 67: Crispy Roast Duck
Tang Qiaoqiao continued to perform weird actions in "Zhiyong Chong Chong". Following the roller coaster singing of "Heroic Song" and carrying a hamburger, her series of operations in the haunted house are also truly high-powered.
Originally, because of the haunted house plot, many netizens prepared early. They waited for the moment when the ghosts came out to put on the barrage of "freedom, equality, justice, the rule of law, patriotism, dedication, honesty, and friendliness."
[T/N: These are socialism core values advocated by the Communist Party of China. One of the key factors of their propaganda is to reject superstition, so this is a communist version of a barrage of prayers.]
However, everyone is fully guarded but didn't expect that the real scary one is not Mr. Zombie with his long tongue, but Tang Qiaoqiao.
The director was also full of cheeky thoughts and intentionally did not show Tang Qiaoqiao taking away the skull mask. Therefore, like Mr. Zombie, the audience suddenly faced Tang Qiaoqiao wearing the skull mask, which suddenly terrified a group of unprepared netizens.
【My gosh! I was so scared that my heart stopped beating for a second oooooooo】
【The zombie didn't scare me, but Tang Qiaoqiao really scared me. Help, I dare not watch】
【Feng Tian was too right, Tang Qiaoqiao, this woman, is even more terrifying】
Even though they didn't dare to look at it, the netizens still bite the bullet and continue watching. When they saw Tang Qiaoqiao picking a yellow spell from the wall and sticking it on the zombie's face, the barrage swept away the "scared" mode, once again occupied by "hahahahahaha".
【OMG. It is terrifying and funny. I was so smashed by this show】
【Tang Qiaoqiao is really poisonous. How can those yellow stickers be so handy? LOLLLL】
【The funniest thing is that the zombie really doesn't move anymore. Everyone is so entertaining. Why did I never meet such a cooperative ghost?】
Then Tang Qiaoqiao taught Mr. Zombie to improve his business skills and made the audience laugh. She also mentioned Lin Zhengying, which caused a barrage of words, "The classic is back."
[T/N: In the raw, they said: "爷青回" (Yé qīng huí) which generally refers to the return or comeback of well-known people, classic animations, games, film and television dramas, etc. Netizens express it through the words "Ye Qinghui" to express emotion that the classic things that appeared in their youth have come back.]
Tang Qiaoqiao deserves to be a woman who can kick a perverted wretched man. Don't try to provoke her in any dimension, which is including the world-famous Sadako.
Tang Qiaoqiao's action towards Sister Sadako directly made the audience silly.
【Sisters put "Niubi" on the screen. Awesome! 】
[T/N: 牛批 = Niubi is another common internet slang which means "powerful, capable, superior, or awesome."]
When they saw the chainsaw man offering the night pearl respectfully, everyone was not surprised anymore. Indeed, everyone could only lie flat when they met Tang Qiaoqiao.
Who can handle this?
This is a haunted house adventure, but Tang Qiaoqiao is clearly a haunted house killer.
When the show is broadcast, all the hot spots are on Tang Qiaoqiao. There are three or four headlines related to her. The director is just laughing. He plans to wait for the next season to request Tang Qiaoqiao to be a permanent guest.
Previously, Tang Qiaoqiao and Shen Liang had a scandal because of the recording of this show. Although it turned out to be a mistake in the end, many people still want to see if the two intersect.
Tang Qiaoqiao and Shen Liang were only in the same frame for a short time until the final task: tearing up name tags. However, Tang Qiaoqiao only took five seconds to tear off Shen Liang's name tag.
'Cold blood!'
'Ruthless!'
【Fuck, whoever said that Tang Qiaoqiao and Shen Liang are ambiguous, get out of here】
【Tang Qiaoqiao's dislike for Shen Liang is almost written on her face】
【No, I want to knock wood. Don't you think this is more emotional? Love and kill each other. Ahh】
【Upstairs, wakes up. Even if all the men in the world are dead, Tang Qiaoqiao can't be with Shen Liang】
...
After the show, the scandal between Tang Qiaoqiao and Shen Liang can be said to have completely collapsed. At the same time, Tang Qiaoqiao managed to pull a movie resource because of her method in the haunted house.
However, it was a horror movie script.
Translated by Serena Love. Posted on pure tl.com do not repost / steal
The director of this film had shaved his head even though he was only in his thirties. He explained that he saw Tang Qiaoqiao's own horror atmosphere in the haunted house, and she had also promoted herself as a horror film actress in "Survival in the Wild." So he wanted to pass the script over to her to have a look.
This director is really... too discerning.
Many actors dream of appearing on the big screen, so Tang Qiaoqiao was very excited when she received the script.
Domestic horror movies have always been synonymous with vulgar and bad movies. Basically, actors with a bit of brain will not even look at it. Most of the actors who will star in a horror movie are newcomers who have just graduated and have nowhere to go.
However, Tang Qiaoqiao read the script carefully. The name of this movie is very simple. It is called "Cocoon." It is not a brainless horror film similar to Sadako vs. Kayako, but a true psychological thriller.
The heroine of the movie, Yu Li, is an ordinary woman. She listened to her parents and studied hard. She also listened to her parents' opinions about her choice of university and was admitted to a medium-grade university. After graduation, she became a teacher.
Later, she met a man, fell in love, got married, and gave birth to a pair of twins. Everything went smoothly and happily.
She is a good daughter of her parents and a good sister to her younger brother. After getting married, she is a good wife for her husband and a good mother for her children. She is simply a winner in life.
The beginning of the story is that Yu Li and her husband took their children to a small villa in the country during the summer vacation. However, since entering the villa, strange things have happened one after another.
On the first night, inexplicable blood stains appeared in the room of the two children.
The next night, the husband sleeping next to her suddenly sleepwalked and went outside to dig a hole with a shovel.
When it was daytime, Yu Li found a lot of dead ducks in the pit.
However, her husband didn't know anything and didn't care about these things. He blamed Yu Li for making a fuss.
The strange attitude of her husband made Yu Li worried, and she decided to find out the truth.
However, the truth of the matter brought her a devastating blow.
After Tang Qiaoqiao finished reading the script, a heavy feeling of powerlessness surged in her heart.
This movie does not simply use horror to attract attention. Its focus is the deep exploration of women's fate. Anyway, Tang Qiaoqiao decided to take the movie.
She immediately called the director to agree on the signing time. The director was overjoyed when he heard that Tang Qiaoqiao was willing to pick it up.
When Tang Qiaoqiao called the director, Shen Yue was listening.
When she hung up, Shen Yue reminded her coldly, "Are you sure you want to choose a horror movie for the first big screen?"
Tang Qiaoqiao nodded firmly. "I'm sure."
"You should know that when a horror movie is released, sometimes it will face more scrutiny. Sometimes, it may even end up not being released for various reasons." Shen Yue added.
Tang Qiaoqiao said, "I know, but that's something for the future. Now I am deeply moved by this story, and I decided to act in it."
"But." She frowned.
"But what?" Shen Yue asked. Maybe she is really regretting it.
"But what I'm thinking now is whether I want to eat roast duck at noon?" Tang Qiaoqiao pursed the corner of her mouth. "There were so many dead ducks in the script just now, so I suddenly wanted to eat roast duck."
Shen Yue: ...
Tang Qiaoqiao's association power to food has expanded. It's too wide.
He was worried that her career would be ruined because she is making a horror movie, but instead, she wanted to eat roast duck.
Tang Qiaoqiao always does what she said. Just as the saying goes, "The autumn duck is fat, chicken in the cage is fat." Now it is the end of fall, and it is when the duck is at the fattest. When will you eat them if it's not at this time?
Fresh ducks were delivered in the morning and have been cleaned up. Tang Qiaoqiao carefully massaged the ducks with pepper, star anise, fennel, cinnamon, and other spices and marinated them for two hours.
After the duck was marinated, Tang Qiaoqiao took it again in a hot bath. The hot boiling water was poured on the duck body over and over again, and the duck skin was scalded very brightly. This step was to make the duck skin shrink and tighten.
Translated by Serena Love. Posted on pure tl.com do not repost / steal
Then she took dark soy sauce, honey, and fruit vinegar to make a crisping glaze. She brushed it on the scalded duck, repeated it two or three times, then hung it in a ventilated place and let the skin dry naturally.
The duck that has been brushed with crisping glaze will be more crispy when roasted. Tang Qiaoqiao also poured more than half a jar of water from her homemade pickled pepper in the duck belly. It will make the duck meat more delicious and made the duck skin thinner.
Fill the duck with soup, brush the skin one more time with crisping glaze, put it in the oven, and start roasting.
The duck was roasting over there, and Tang Qiaoqiao was not idle over here. She started making lotus leaf buns. After kneading smooth dough, she let it rise for half an hour, divided it into small portions, and rolled them into thin dough layers. Next, she spread a little oil on each layer, stack them together and steam them in a pot.
After being steamed, the lotus leaf buns are thin, transparent, and elastic. Each thin slice is not sticky or broken, and they are very smooth.
With the "ding" of the oven, the roast duck is finally ready.
Tang Qiaoqiao brought out the roast duck, wearing heat-insulating gloves. The roast duck was bright red and oily, with abdomen facing up, smooth and shiny, as if it had condensed a layer of crispy skin. The tangy fragrance was even more unstoppable.
Although Shen Yue bad-mouthed Tang Qiaoqiao in his heart, he knew how to eat. So when the roast duck came out, he sat down obediently at the table.
Tang Qiaoqiao slices the duck very beautifully. Her knife is fast, and the sliced duck meat is thin and even. When the meat is neatly stacked on the plate, it makes the index finger move when you look at it. A whole duck was sliced into exactly one hundred and eighty portions.
Shen Yue's throat moved and asked, "Can we eat it now?"
Tang Qiaoqiao put the lotus leaf buns, hoisin sauce, thin-shredded green onion, and cucumber shreds next to the roast duck, then made a "please" gesture.
"Please enjoy Tang Qiaoqiao's secret roast duck."
When Shen Yue picked up the chopsticks and just wanted to pick up the lotus leaf cake with it, Tang Qiaoqiao said hurriedly, "Eating roast duck will be more delicious when you hold it with your hands. Don't use chopsticks this time."
Shen Yue glanced at Tang Qiaoqiao's movement of filling the bun with meat. He hesitated for a few seconds and then followed Tang Qiaoqiao twisting a thin lotus leaf cake, smearing it with sweet sauce, picking up the duck meat, and picking a few sticks of green onion and cucumber shreds. He put down the chopsticks, rolled up the bun by hand, and sent it to his mouth.
Shen Yue took a bite, and his eyes brightened. The first thing he tasted was the taste of a lotus leaf bun. It was soft and chewy, but his tongue touched the taste of roast duck after biting it down.
The roast duck is crispy on the outside and tender on the inside. The duck skin is extra crispy and full of fat. You can still feel the beautiful sound of "crunch" when you taste it carefully. The duck meat under the duck skin is tender and juicy. The duck meat is not fishy at all but full of honey taste. The sweet taste penetrates the duck meat and melted with the rich taste formed by the duck oil, rippling between the lips and teeth.
The green onion and cucumber shreds bring a refreshing taste, coupled with the mellow taste of the hoisin sauce and the thickness of the duck. It is a perfect match.
Tang Qiaoqiao found that Shen Yue especially likes to eat duck skin. His mouth is full with two mouthfuls of ducks. It was so greasy.
Translated by Serena Love. Posted on pure tl.com do not repost / steal
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