TPPYNG Chapter 10
Translated by Novice Translations
Executive Summary: Facts have proven that exposing faults harms oneself, especially if one’s martial arts aren’t good, but the Regent jiejie didn’t pay attention to the walls that have ears and purely courted death.
Chapter 10: Ben Gong Will Skin You Alive and Pick Your Veins
The Regent jiejie handled the government affairs for the day, walked out of Xuande Palace Hall and was about to go to Shufang Palace Hall to pay homage to the imperial princess. The meddlesome head steward of Wang’fu waited at the door, hurriedly came forward and whispered: “Wangye, the emissary of the sea king has arrived at Wang’fu and has been waiting for a long time in the back hall.”
The sea king, known as the silver face demon, was one of hundreds of pirates on the sea more than a decade ago. However, in the days when Zhao Zhi and Lu Wu Shuang rose in the Central Plains, the silver-faced demon also began her conquest to become king. Today, she has become the emperor of the sea.
In the eastern sea area, the first powerful navy in the history of the world emerged, nearly monopolizing maritime trade.
Lu Wu Shuang nodded and called a familiar little eunuch to report her itinerary to the imperial princess and she went home. The housekeeper next to her held back his smile. He was Lu Wu Shuang’s soldier and later served as captain of the scouts. In the war, he retired from the army because of his injuries and stayed in the Wang’fu as the chief steward. He was very clear about the relationship between Lu Wu Shuang and Zhao Zhi from head to tail.
He thought of the former Regent who was insufferably arrogant and strived to oppose the imperial princess to separate. In those days, the Regent and imperial princess were two parties that couldn’t coexist. Would he have been able to foresee the former becoming the owner of Wang’fu today? Now it seems that Lu Wu Shuang is a wife and slave, the housekeeper laughed from the bottom of his heart internally.
In the back hall of Wang’fu, at first glance, she saw a Hu1 clothed woman in her twenties sitting on a sandalwood chair on the left side. She sat upright and elegantly. She waited for Lu Wu Shuang and looked calm and unruffled in the midst of chaos. She saw Lu Wu Shuang coming over and her mouth was pursed. She said, “Lu Wangye, can’t afford tea, still expel guests in a disguised form?”
Lu Wu Shuang waved her hand and dismissed others to retreat, then said to the housekeeper: “Go, fetch Yunyue tea from my study and make her a cup.” Sitting on the left side of the woman, she glared at her and said, “Your title is ‘Emissary of the Sea King’. Did you come to my residence in such big fanfare to let all the big court officials of Ming know that we have such a great relationship?”
“Don’t tell me that this is a shallow relationship?” The Hu clothed woman sneered, “Are you still afraid of the court officials’ suspicion and jealousy? In the history of China, which Regent can live peacefully? There’s no good ending except to usurp! Do you want to be Yang Jian2 or Dorgon3? Ah, I think you’d better usurp the throne as soon as possible!”
The steward who personally brought the teacups to the tearoom heard the words “usurp the throne”. His face didn’t change nor did his heart palpitate, he was calm as if he heard “going to eat”. He unhurriedly placed the two cups in the tray, bowed and retreated.
“Who said? Wasn’t Zhou Gong4 a regent?” The Regent said leisurely and was carefree. She sat beside the Hu clothed woman, picked up the teacup, brushed the tea stem with the tea cover that sat on the water surface, then sniffed the fragrant tea.
“Tsk, like I care about your life and death!” The Hu clothed woman looked at her in disgust. “Although Zhao Zhi looks like that and there’s nothing great about her, but she restrained your fox spirit which is a great deed that benefit the country and its people.” She glanced up and down Lu Wu Shuang, especially at the red patches on her body. “You are like this…tsk, I didn’t see it, Zhao Zhi looks refined and righteous, but unexpectedly is an S!”
Lu Wu Shuang immediately retorted: “Your family’s silver face demon or iron T! I see her facial paralysis, which is as black as carbon and her muscles are like lumps of iron, tsk tsk.”
“Your sister’s face is paralyzed! She’s cool and handsome, don’t you understand? Why can’t you learn from your family’s da xiaojie, Zhao Zhi! Bronze is called a healthy color. Look at your soft skin and tender flesh, as if you’ve been sunbathing like a vampire for many years. It’s just malnutrition! My family’s silver has a good figure and no excess fat on her body. Ordinary people can’t help but envy it!”
“Show off P! Your silver face demon is like a stronghold female overlord. Have you eaten at all, have you eaten her since you transmigrated? Do you think your little body can stand it? We love each other and attack each other mutually, which makes you envious, jealous and hateful!”
The Hu clothed woman glared at her: “I used to be straight, but now I accepted it. What am I willing to do? I’m not a hypocrite like someone who is obviously a M and hoots to oneself that it’s an attack!”
“I naturally was constrained by force! If it wasn’t for you, would I have transmigrated? When I was a black belt in Taekwondo, it was the equivalent of a ‘Wulin Expert’. Now that I’m here, I can’t even beat my family’s Qing Qing single finger! If it wasn’t because you ran away from home in the middle of the night, would it be necessary for me to pick you up in the wilderness and fall off the cliff?”
Regent jiejie, you dare say this sentence in the presence of the Zhao Zhi princess dian xia?
“You dare to say! Not just your driving skills, but thought it was a good idea to pick up the phone while driving! Who was responsible for causing us to overturn and fall off the cliff?”
“Who cried and called in the middle of the night and said I was lost, ah, and asked to be picked up by someone? Who called out jiejie with a ‘sweet mouth’, ah? I’m your father’s secretary, not your babysitter!”
“You’re my father’s worker, I can do whatever I want, you’re not my babysitter, ah!”
“I worked for your father, not as a slave! I don’t know what to say! If I didn’t fall off the cliff, how could I have transmigrated? Would I have met her who was a martial arts expert without transmigrating? Would I have been into S/M if I didn’t encounter her who was a martial arts expert? Of course, it doesn’t matter who is below or on top in love or attacks, but now I think S has valuable military force. It’s all your fault that I fell into this motherfucking world of martial arts!”
“Pah! On one hand, blame me for harming you, it doesn’t matter who is on top or bottom, you can’t ‘attack immeasurably.’ In this way, don’t you think you’re thick skinned! Lu Wu Shuang, you henpecked male, your wife is strict! If Zhao Zhi knew that you were going to leave her and flee to Heishan County and that you said, ‘You and I are the same forest birds, I will fly when disaster strikes.’ Do you think you will be able to live to see the sun tomorrow?”
“Zhuge Yue! You have the courage to say that, I will write a report about you and Prince Yan’s romantic life and send it to your family’s silver face demon! I’ll see how she sorts out the “gentle and soft” ladylike sea princess!”
“Good! If you dare send it, I will remind your family’s princess that in that same year, in the fragrant and beautiful inner curtain that you seduced Wang Shaoyan, the general manager of Jiangnan in order to live!”
“Oh! At that time, it was suspected that the relationship between the sea king and captain Lu was ambiguous and deliberately seduce and frame people’s family innocence, so they were wronged for no reason and was whipped 20 times. I heard that it was an insidious woman who played both the role of the wind and rain is now the one who swears, ah!”
“Tsk! You say so, it seems that you were arrested for betraying the imperial princess, but you were afraid of being punished. In order to create a fait accompli5, you cried after adding joyous separation in the imperial princess’s wine glass to seduce people’s family, like raindrops on a pear blossom. Aren’t you the same as those snake and scorpion women who demanded my family be held responsible!”
The two cynical shrews screamed at each other, with rapt attention and single-hearted devotion with their bickering. They didn’t know how ugly the two heads of the state were at all, who sat cross legged on the roof.
Facing the north, bronzed skin, silver hair and white eyebrows, three scars on her left cheek like claws, which looked extremely ferocious. But on the other side, her original beauty can be seen, like a silver shark standing in water. She wore men’s short shirt and trousers that didn’t cover her ample chest and she carried a small wine glass expressionlessly. However, if you look closely, you could see that the glass was already full of cracks, so that the broken glass that held a full glass of wine that didn’t leak a drop was a real miracle, ah!
The one facing the south, on the contrary, has black hair, black eyes, gelatin-like skin that would break from a finger. Her noble eyebrows were slightly raised, which showed her majesty as the first authority in imperial China, she smiled, her slender fingers held the wine glass, elegantly and nimbly, like a dormant cheetah. She smiled and seemed to be in a good mood but if you look at her eyes that burned with fire and her white teeth that gritted deeply, it could be predicted that someone’s life wasn’t better than death tonight.
“Sea king, you arrived from afar, please drink this cup.” The imperial princess Zhao Zhi’s voice was clear and graceful, beautiful and moving.
“Thank you.” Two simple words, with a hoarse taste, it felt that the sound of the syllables was blown by the salty sea breeze.
“My wife is naughty and mischievous, and her words are insolent, she’s lacking in manners.” The sea king was straightforward in speech and didn’t hide the helplessness in her tone.
“Where, my family’s fuma6 and the sea princess hasn’t been reunited for a long time. They are incoherent, which makes the sea king ridicule them.” After all, the imperial princess was born into a family background. The royal family of the Central Plains uses such gentle words.
However, it doesn’t mean she was so “cultured” at heart.
—Lu! Wu! Shuang! You’re courting death!
—Ben gong will punish you by separation by five horses later…no, ben gong will skin you alive and pick your veins!
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Footnotes:
Hu – Describes non-Han people from Ancient China.
Yang Jian – first Sui emperor Yang Jian (541-604), reigned 581-604.
Dorgon – 14th son of Nurhaci (1612-1651), successful general and instrumental for Manchu conquest of China. He ruled China as regent from 1644-1650 for his nephew Emperor Shunzhi.
Zhou gong – Duke of Zhou, played an important role as regent in founding Western Zhou and also known as “God of Dreams.”
Fait accompli – English word; a thing that has already happened or been decided before those affected hear about it, leaving them with no option but to accept it.
Fuma – husband of the princess; a husband marrying into the royal family via the princesses.